Greetings! Welcome to my blog! This is my first post and I’m so excited to be able to connect with you in this way. “Welcome to my Swirl” is my way of sharing my life and world with you. Thanks to my coaching and ministerial trainings and tools, I approach everything that happens in my life as a lesson and a gift. My experience is that this perspective clears the way for a deeper connection with the Source of all, including our own intuition and psychic guidance. I share this with you so that you can both get to know me, and also so that you can open to ALL you are, and all you came on planet to be.
I’m nursing my Wounded Worrier today. This is the part of me that worries about EVERYTHING! This is a very young part of me that has picked up the worries and fears of my parents who had tried for many years unsuccessfully to have children and then were terrified of what could go wrong with me once I arrived, while also wanting to be “perfect” parents.
Unbeknownst to me, Wounded Worrier attended a holiday party as me last night. I’d been stressing about this event all day – what to wear, how would my hair come out, would everyone see I can’t pay my bills, what would I talk about, would I be able to find parking, would I be able to find this place at all!, was the gift I was bringing good enough, was the dessert offering I was bringing good enough – and on and on and on until there I was at the party when I physically became over heated, skin cool and clammy, couldn’t breathe, felt like I was going to faint, felt like I was going to throw up… and felt ASHAMED of how I was feeling.
In times past, I would have made a hasty departure and gone home, but I did NOT want to do this. I love the people I was with, I wanted me to stay and be me with and in front of these people. I did one of the hardest things for me to do – I asked for help. I was talking to a woman – thankfully a woman I know and feel safe with, isn’t that the way it is with this loving Universe we are alive in!?- I blurted out that I didn’t feel well and she immediately took me to sit down, gave me a cold water – which I ran across my skin rather than drank, and helped me get to the bathroom. There, I sat and breathed, deep all the way into my belly, for a few minutes, splashed more cold water on me…..
And then the miracle happened, I was me…. for the first time ALL DAY, I was me… I went back to that party and ate, I laughed, I had a great time!
Here’s the magic in being ourself, easy, breathing, accepting ourSelf messy, open to being alive Self….. At the party we played that game where you bring a gift, then get to either keep or “steal” another gift… Someone had a gift I really wanted, there had been two “steals” and the next one would get to keep it. There were three people still to go before me….. NO ONE wanted that gift, I “stole” it and it came home with me…
I’m learning to recognize my Wounded Worrier earlier, give her the attention she needs, and then be open to showing up wherever I am, however I am – even when that’s messy….. So long as I’m present with mySelf, I’m also open to the universe and the love that comes from that space can make miracles and magic happen.
How does your Wounded Worrier ask for your attention? Have you had an experience of being brave enough to admit you were messy, and then have things turn out great after you got this out of the way? I’d love to hear what’s going on with you, what you’re learning, and what miracles that learning is allowing to come to you.
Check out my radio show “In the Same Space as Aislyn” to hear more about what’s swirling in my world, and how to receive the gifts in whatever is swirling in yours.
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